


Time to readjust

by davidssideaccount



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Prison, M/M, Post-Prison
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-13
Updated: 2018-01-17
Packaged: 2019-03-04 07:40:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,183
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13359651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/davidssideaccount/pseuds/davidssideaccount
Summary: Dan is fresh out of prison, he's been sent to a rehabilitation house to help him settle back into the real world. Inside he is met by a white room and a man named Phil. Can he be trusted..?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Just as a note, I haven't done any research for this fic, I'm going off my own experience and previous research for other fics. I don't mean any offence. But if you notice something that is offensive please let me know and I'll do what I can to change it.

****

Dan stared down at himself, he’d never seen clothes so white, trousers, tshirt, boxers, socks. The bed he was laying on was 100% white, the walls and floor too, not a mark or stain on them, everything looked brand new. He wondered where everything had come from from, did this place have their own supplier of exclusively white stuff?

Probably.

He closed his eyes for a moment, exhaling slowly, he knew he was thinking about this to distract himself, he needed to stop and actually focus on what was happening to him. That was part of his problem, he avoided things until they became problems so large they could literally sink a ship.

The morning had been horribly hectic for him, moving from the prison building had been stressful as hell. The prospect of not knowing anyone here, being forced to make friends with people he would probably try to avoid in two years’ time was anxiety inducing.

He was in a rehabilitation centre, he’d be allowed more freedom here which was nice, but he’d been away for so long he wasn’t sure how he’d handle it.

And any minute now he was going to meet his new roommate. He hoped beyond hope that it was going to be someone who would keep to themselves and not force him to socialise, but from what he’d heard they paired people in a way that forced people out of their shells. The idea of being out in any way scared him, honestly.

Every now and then someone walked past his door and he felt his heart rise up into his throat, hopefully it was his heart and not vomit. The last thing he wanted was to throw up, how humiliating would that be.

After a few more false alarms he saw the handle move, deep voices chatting and laughing just outside.

He sat straight on the bed, his legs crossed, the thought suddenly struck him that he should try and look busy, he didn’t want his roommate walking in and seeing him just sitting there staring, that would look so weird.

He grabbed a pamphlet off the bedside table and opened it just in time, the door swung open.

He pretended not to notice.

“Oh hey,” a man’s voice said softly from the door.

Still Dan didn’t look up.

“You must be my new roomie,” the man continued.

Now Dan looked up.

The man was tall, almost as tall as him, with black hair swept to the side, and he had a sweet friendly smile painted on his face. He was wearing a light blue hoodie, a nice change from the uniform white of the rest of the building.

“Uh, hi,” Dan said, his voice slightly higher than he had meant it to be. He cleared his throat, “Yeah, my name’s Dan, good to meet you.”

The guy looked Dan up and down in a way that made Dan feel oddly defensive. “I knew Ed was moving out but I didn’t realise they’d fill his spot so quick,” he said seemingly to himself. His smile widened after a moment, “Uh, sorry, I’m Phil. It’s good to meet you too.”

“Phil,” Dan said to himself, committing the name to memory. “So, how long have you been here?” he asked.

Phil half shrugged, “3 years almost. It’s quite a good place once you get used to it.” He chuckled lightly, “I kinda don’t want to leave.”

Dan nodded awkwardly, his stomach twisting, he had a bunch of questions about life here but he didn’t want to seem like one of those people who just kept talking and never shut up.

Phil came in and sat down at the desk in the corner, that like everything else in the room was also white.

“Uh,” Dan heard himself vocalise, he bit his lip at the sound and moved his eyes back to the pamphlet, he didn’t want to ask all his questions yet. But it was too late, Phil had heard him, his eyes drifted over to him.

“What was that?” he asked, still smiling.

“Nothing,” Dan said quickly, “...I was just wondering uh, why is everything here white?”

“Oh,” Phil frowned to himself, thinking, “You know I’m not really sure. I think it’s got uh…” he swung in his chair a little, “It’s got something to do with like mental health stuff? If you’re in a lighter room then it kinda forces you to be happy or something. I think I asked someone once but it was ages ago.”

Dan scoffed.

“You think it’s funny?” Phil asked, smiling again.

Dan’s face fell a little, he didn’t want Phil to think he thought it was a joke. “No, no, I… I just think it’s going to take a bit more than a white room to cheer me up.”

Phil let out a soft laugh, shaking his head a little and turning back to his desk. “It’ll help more than you think.”

Dan let out a soft grunt, watching Phil for a moment, he was looking at something just out of his eyeline. He wasn’t sure what.

He looked back down at his pamphlet and began to read it. It was one of the ones about life in the centre, he hadn’t had the chance to look it over yet, truthfully he wasn’t really interested, this place couldn’t be too different to prison.

He frowned as he read through the pamphlet.

“Hey, Phil,” he said as he read through the first few paragraphs.

Phil turned his head again, he let out a grunt of acknowledgement.

“It says in this why everything’s white. Uh, you’re right it is mental health stuff.”

Phil nodded, “Oh, that must be where I know it from. I guess I wasn’t really paying attention to it.”

Dan felt himself stiffen a little as Phil got up from the desk and walked across the room towards him.

“What else does it say in there?” Phil asked. His smile had faded a little.

Dan shrugged, staring up at Phil. He didn’t quite know what Phil was going to do, maybe he’d misjudged him and what he’d said had provoked him or something?

“I was hoping I’d get to show you round and stuff, I can’t if that gives everything away.”

Dan’s mouth lulled open slightly, his eyes darted from Phil to the pamphlet, “Well I can stop reading it if you wanna show me the ropes.”

Phil shrugged, seeming to consider it, after a few seconds he shook his head, “Nah, you read that, let me read it after and if there are any gaps I’ll happily fill them in.”

Dan let a small smile come to his face, “Thanks, I appreciate it.” The smile stayed on his face as Phil walked back to his desk. It was nice of him to offer, it sounded as if Phil actually wanted to be helpful, Dan could only hope he wouldn’t want paying back.


	2. Chapter 2

Dan sat on one of the white sofas in the wreck room, his head in a book. He didn’t want to talk to anyone else, he’d had enough of talking, he’d had a therapy session earlier in the day and he planned to go and lay down as soon as his room was cleaned. It was so… exhausting.

He had therapy 4 times a week and group activities running 24/7, there was always something to do, it was too much, he just wanted to sit alone in the dark with a book. The book he was reading was an old childhood favourite of his, set in a fantasy world filled with dragons. Dan would give anything for a portal to open up and suck him through to that world.

He huddled in on himself a little as a group of people came in, they were laughing loudly, Dan hated nothing more.

Maybe they wouldn’t see him, his white clothing would blend into the white sofa and he’d become temporarily invisible.

“Hey Dan!” one of the group shouted.

Dan’s stomach sank as he heard it, the last thing he wanted to do right now was talk to people. He looked up hesitantly to see Phil staring down at him. “Oh hey,” he said, summoning all of his strength to sound cheerful.

Phil looked him up and down, “You ok?”

Dan forced a nod.

Phil always seemed so happy, he loved being social, he loved the attention, Dan could tell.

Phil mimicked Dan’s nod. “We’re going to the cafeteria, they’ve got a new coffee machine in there apparently it does lattes and hot chocolate and stuff now, wanna come with us?”

Dan shook his head slowly, trying to act as if he was considering it. “I don’t think so, I’m a bit tired from therapy, I’m just gunna relax.”

Phil nodded in understanding and the group began to move away, Dan heard one of the others, whose name he couldn’t remember, say quite clearly, “He’s never gunna do anything with us.”

Dan frowned, if he was getting a reputation as ‘the guy who never did anything’ then that was good, maybe in time they’d stop talking to him and leave him to focus on himself. He didn’t want to do anything he didn’t have to.

In his mind there was no point in making friends while he was here, he’d never talk to them once he got out. Phil always hung around with those guys but after leaving he’d probably never see them again.

He looked up at the clock and worked out how long he’d been sitting there. Almost an hour and a half. He’d been told that cleaning would take about an hour, so now he should be able to go back to his room, lay on clean sheets, maybe have a nap.

He tried not to get lost on his walk back to his room, the long hallways reminded him of a school, though he’d never been to a school that was painted white and smelled clean.

He climbed the stairs and entered room 14b. The place was set out as if it were trying to emulate a small apartment building but it failed miserably.

The clean sheets felt amazing beneath him as he lay down, he hadn’t fully realised how tense he’d felt before, it was so nice to relax by himself, although he wished he had some music to listen to.

After only a few minutes he heard noises outside the door, it was probably Phil and his ‘buddies’.

Dan prayed to himself that they wouldn’t come in, and swore under his breath as he saw the handle twitch.

Phil walked in, finishing his conversation through the half open door. He turned his head to Dan and let the door close behind him. Dan looked over at him, surprised to see him holding two paper cups.

“I brought you some hot chocolate,” Phil said happily, walking over to Dan and placing a cup on the bedside table. He then took the few steps over to his own bed and sat down.

Dan looked at the paper cup, “Oh, wow, thank you. You didn’t have to.” He sat up on the bed to take a sip of the drink. It wasn’t great but he hadn’t had a hot chocolate in ages, it was more than good enough.

“I thought I should, I remember how stressful my first few weeks were, once you get used to all the emotional labour it’s a lot easier.”

Dan shook his head absently, “It’s not that bad. I’m fine.”

Phil smiled, “You’re allowed to be not fine, you do know that right?”

A small lump lodged itself in Dan’s throat, he cleared his throat to move it. He’d been told many times by professionals that it was ok to have trouble, to not feel ok, but hearing it from someone else felt different.

He took a sip of his hot chocolate, his eyes focusing on that for a moment, he could feel Phil’s eyes on him but looking up at them felt like a bit too much right now.

“Thanks for the drink,” he said quietly, “but I’m fine, really.”

He heard Phil let out a small huff.

“Sure,” Phil said weakly.

Dan put his drink back on the bed side table, shifting on the bed and picking his book back up.

“You gunna go back out to your buddies?” he asked after a second, he could tell Phil was still looking at him.

“Nah, I don’t think so. It gets a bit tiring being around that many people all the time.”

Dan raised an eyebrow, glancing over at Phil again, “You never seemed tired of it before.”

Phil shrugged, shifting on his bed and drinking his own drink, “Well… Every day’s different.”

That was a phrase Dan had heard a lot since he’d arrived here. Back in prison there wasn’t as much of a focus on mental wellness, he’d always felt it was more ‘You feel bad? You should do’, deny it as they might.

Every day is different was a good phrase. You have slip ups and setbacks, but they’re no big deal and it doesn’t mean you’re not getting better.

Dan felt his spirits lift a little as he thought about it, sure he felt crummy right now but tomorrow was another day and it would probably be different, maybe even better.

“Yeah that’s true,” he finally said.


	3. Chapter 3

Dan couldn’t shake the heavy anxious feeling that hung over him today. His morning therapy session had gone well, but he’d been told that he was being let out of the compound, under supervision of course, to go shopping. It was a reward for his progress and good behaviour over his first month here.

It didn’t feel like a reward, it felt like a challenge, and he wasn’t sure if he was up to it.

He did feel like he needed to go out, soak in something new, have some time out in regular society for the first time in… Almost 4 years…

Dan let out a huff at the realisation; it’d been 4 years since he was locked up. It didn’t feel like that long.

At the same time it was daunting. It’d been 4 years.

Everything must have changed in that time. He felt lucky that he wasn’t in his home town, going there and finding everything different would be too much.

Thinking about it was making him spiral, he could feel himself getting more and more anxious, if he continued on like this he’d end up chickening out, he could tell. He needed to distract himself.

Despite his apprehension he did want to go, he hadn’t been shopping in so long.

He decided to go and have some lunch, something that wouldn't be too strenuous on him socially or mentally. He still found it a little hard talking to people after a therapy session.

He walked to the cafeteria and looked at the available food. Everything was premade and presented quite nicely, of course they wouldn’t allowed people to prepare their own food- too many knives.

He picked out one of the fresher looking plates, a ham sandwich with a small side salad. Salad wasn’t really his thing but when the dressing they used here was lovely, eating well was supposed to help your mental health too.

After picking out a drink of apple juice he looked across the small white circular tables, locating one that was empty and out of the way and making his way to it.

He tried not to sit near Phil and his friend group, he always waited until they’d picked out their food and sat down before he even came in. As much as he liked Phil his friends were too loud, and it was very cliquey; they’d all been here for a long time and they knew everything about each other, they had shared history, even if he wanted to Dan couldn’t break into the group.

But he didn’t want to, so that was fine.

He tried not to think about the other people in the room, instead focusing on his food. He’d certainly tasted better but compared to prison food it wasn’t bad.

As he ate he still couldn’t help thinking about his trip out. He’d been told he’d be going with a small group of 3 or 4 others. He hoped it wouldn’t be anyone he didn’t like, not that there was anyone he did like. Though truthfully he’d rather go round with people he didn’t really like than strangers.

Before he knew it he’d finished his food, the time flashed by but his head was still buzzing with anxiety, it was starting to make him feel sick.

He picked up his plate and walked across the room to put it away, passing Phil’s table on the way.

“Dan!” Phil said with a smile as he noticed him. “How’s it going? You had therapy this morning right?”

Dan paused, taking a moment to pull himself from his head and actually absorb what Phil had said. “Yeah?”

“With Doctor Mills?”

Dan nodded, “Yeah, why?”

“She’s taking her morning group out to town, right? Are you coming?”

Dan frowned, he didn’t want to go if too many people from Phil’s friend group were going. He knew they’d make him feel like a third wheel, he’d feel guilty about doing anything he wanted. “Uh, maybe, I dunno.” He forced a fake smile, “Are you guys going?”

Phil shrugged, “Just me, I’m checking with everyone so I know if I’ll have any friends with me.”

Dan’s mouth hung open a little, “Oh,” he said with another nod, still fake smiling. The idea of going with just Phil wasn’t too bad, it’d give him a chance to get to know him better. “Cool, well uh. I think I am going, I’ll let you know for sure later though.”

Phil nodded enthusiastically and smiled widely, reaching out to pat Dan’s arm, “That’s great! They have the best pretzels in town maybe I could buy you one?”

Dan’s fake smile became a little more natural, “Yeah sure,” he let out a small huff, “Fuck, it’s been years since I’ve had a pretzel. I almost forgot they existed.”

Phil’s eyes widened a little, “They are _so_ good, I’m definitely getting you one.”

“Yeah, alright. Sounds good,” Dan said, turning to walk away from them, “I look forward to it.”

It only now occurred to him that Phil must have been taken out multiple times before now, that must be how he’d gotten that blue hoodie that he wore so often. Maybe Dan would be able to pick out some clothes for himself. Wearing clothes he’d chosen for himself was a luxury he was no longer used to. He’d probably hold up everyone picking something out.

Dan found himself actually smiling as he walked away. Finding out that Phil was going seemed to take some of the weight off him. Saying to Phil he would go had taken away the indecisiveness, now he had to go, he had to get a pretzel with Phil.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey uuuuhhhhh *finger guns* leave a comment.


End file.
